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art of apology |
Kapsule
12/2/2004
A friend relayed the following
adventure on his trip to Japan.
He had just moved to Japan and was now going to the port to
pick up the boxes he had shipped by ship. When he arrived at
the port, he found that he was supposed to have declared
this shipment at the airport customs desk when he arrived.
He hadn’t. An easy mistake.
The customs official explained the gravity of the mistake
and told him what he must do.
“You must explain that you did not claim these at customs.
The official will ask you why you didn’t declare them. You
should answer that you didn’t understand that you needed to.
Then he will ask why you didn’t read that on the forms. Then
you should apologize for not being more careful and promise
never to do it again.”
The customs official kindly modeled the entire conversation,
allowing time for the foreigner to catch these phrases and
memorize them.
When the foreigner finally had it, he asked, “Where do I go
to explain this?”
“Right here.” The official replied. “To me.”
Apology is very important in Japan. It is an art. The simple
apology sumimasen (Roughtly; I’m sorry. Literally: There is
no end) is repeated dozens of times daily – by just about
everyone. Most of us foreigners have had to sign an “I’m
sorry” letter at the airport or some city office. It’s
usually a form letter – you fill in your name and the
specific transgression.
It looks like we will have to write an “I’m sorry” letter to
get into Japan. We found out today that Eryka’s visa will be
issued next week. That is a big praise! Everything has moved
quickly.
However, we also learned that an important paper needed to
get our own visas has now expired. We HAVE our visas, so we
didn’t think we needed it. We were wrong. So, we will
arrive, apologize, and pray that they don’t put us on a
plane headed for…. Pittsburgh.
Thank you all for your prayers for the passport and visa.
They were issued much quicker than we had expected.
We would appreciate prayer that we will indeed be permitted
into the country, despite the date on our form, and for
housing once we arrive. It looks like we will be going in
early January, though the date hasn’t been set yet.
I’m sorry, if this was too long. Sumimasen. There is no end…
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